Author: Piyush Kaushal

Naive and Untamed!

Why this Jhol-a-very Di!

The title seems interesting eh! Given the fact that Kolaveri has gone viral, this might go influenza. One reason why I chose this name is  for a marketing gimmick, and I’ll be candid about it! 🙂

The other reason being the Phunny English, weird words and flop songs involved 😛

Frankly speaking the title seems absurd and outwardly stupid, and I have no qualms in accepting that I was testing my nerdy symptoms here.

Now getting back to the point, what the hell is the post about?

Well I have had a bad day or even better a frustrating day, and this post is an outpour of my pseudo-intellect parallelism (don’t bother understanding this, it’s just something absurd).

I have this habit, whenever I feel infuriated; I want to laugh out loud at this world, myself, sneaky neighbors, constipate-faced bosses, and almost everybody!

Will start with some excellent English verbatim by a P.T teacher (shared by one of my fry-ends)

There is no wind in the football – Because wind is in the air buddy!

I talk, he talk, Why you middle talk? – In the middle of know-where!

You rotate the ground four times – Must be Rajnikanth…mind it! (see the connect 😉 )

You go ‘n understnd the tree – Be eco –friendly dude!

I’ll give you clap – For clap-tivating performance!

Bring your parents with Your Mom ‘n Dad – Applicable only for westerners!

Form a straight circle – With a curved scale!

Open the window let the atmosphere come in – Inhale the wind in air!

The other thing I am gonna blabber about is the changing genre of Bollywood songs. It all started with “Beedi” and now it seems like everybody’s going foolhardy over songs that originated from truck drivers, rehab folks and dingy streets. Last evening, I heard this song “Pauwa laga ke ayi, chikni chameli”! I mean the lyrics are so mess-merizing that you just can’t help pulling off your shoe (yes, even when your socks stink!).

The creativity seems to be taking a new high every second, from See-la ki Jawani, Munni ki bad-naami, Chaalu ke thoo-mke and bhatt not! I imagine next would be something like this:

Champa chatori leke katori

Rangili puspa

Besaram bijuria katili nazaria

Adhia lagake pallu ghumake

I know…I know I should stop here…. you’ve been very patient all this while, and I don’t want to go to the dentist this weekend! 😀

So keep your cool, take a deep breath and smile! 🙂

The motto of this post! Nothing… just wanted to start this year with smiles… No offence intended!

Tadah!

Oh yeah, by the way…. HAPPY NEW YEAR 😀

ये ज़िन्दगी

कहीं कुछ हो की
तक़दीरें बदल जाएँ ये अश्क़ों की …

दिल में तलब है की
मस्जिदें बदल जाएँ ये सजदों की ..

क्या हो तुम और क्या हैं हम ..
ग़म ही में ढूँढ़ते है ग़म..

बात तब हो की जब मौत भी हो ठहाकों की
करें जज़्बात का सौदा
या अपने आप का सौदा

नज़्म तब हो की
कुछ बातें सुनी जाए ये जज़्बों की

 खफा खुद से या खुद-आ से
लहर सी इस धरा से
या उफनते आसमान से

कहें कुछ भी मगर ये सब
मेहेरबानी है रस्मों की

लडखपन मैं सरकती धुप
टहलती नींद बचपन की

वो किस्से मोहब्बत के,
वो चेहरे पे चमक सी अलग

करम उसके भरम उसके
फिसलती रेत वक़्तों की

The Good old Malgudi Days – 3

A horrible week ended with the demise of Mr. Jagjit Singh, a lost irrefutable to every extent… Ghazals would never be the same again. His memories will last forever, may his soul Rest In Peace.

Moving ahead, let’s start with the final episode of “Good Old Malgudi Days” as well.  In case you haven’t read the First and Second Part, read it here! We’ll rig through some miscellaneous stuff here! Like the good old serials, there were some jingles, certain music and advertisements that help us reiterate the famous saying “Old is Gold”. Having said that, the first thing that dwindles across my eyes is “Mile sur mera tumhaara”! What a fine showcase of unity in diversity and well what an essentially melodramatic way to do it! Right since the beginning till the last second, it keeps you thinking, engaged and mesmerized. 🙂

Then comes in the “ Ek titli, Anek Titliyan”. Beauty is in simplicity they say, and how beautifully it brings out the whole concept. Informative in a different manner, a message conveyed and although the animation quality may not look quite convincing in this flabbergasted 3D age, it hits you right there!

“Himmat se agar jute rahen to, badaa kaam bhi hove bhaiya”  : )

“Mungerilal ke haseen sapney” donned the artist in Raghubir Yadav, a meek figured small time clerk who reminded us of Sheikh-chilli. Mr. Mungerilal is always thrashed around by his wife, boss, and father-in-law for being a poor soul. He then finds solace in his dreamland where he takes avenge from his foes, almost becomes a super-man, and dates a beautiful office colleague. To be honest, I think everybody has a Mungerilal deep down the soul, about things we can’t do, we have a dreamland! (Run your mind-horses people) 😀

Alif-Laila was a good adventure thriller, with loads of exciting stories and voyages from Sindbad the sailor, Alladin, Ali Baba and The merchant and the genie. There were flashy lights, uber- cool magical tricks, speaking globes, talking parrots and balderdash faced demons. The suleimani talwar and the music of Arabic origins is worth mentioning, more so coz i always moved with the rhythm… al-habibi 😀

Tadana…tadana…. And here comes the serial which brought a light to the adage of sarcasm and humor collectively. The name being “Flop Show” which was misdirected by Jaspal Bhatti :P… the good thing about this serial being that everything was so meticulously out-of-the hook! The characters were scornfully hilarious, the script was just MAD, and the songs euphoric… here’s one that I remember “Jis Gali mein Kiraydar se jhagda na ho, us gali mein makaan humne lena nahi” 😀 As for the episodes, I really loved the one “Kabristan Ka Chowkidaar” (what a unique title sirji!) wherein the director makes a highly emotional tragedy of love, betrayal and kinship. In the end what they get is “The best comedy serial ever” award 😛 watch it, it’s superfluous!

This era also saw serials like Shanti, which started a new breed of women-centric serials, I don’t remember how far the serial stretched, but for once I saw “Episode no. 936”!! 😮 Mandira Bedi looked like an actress for the first and the last time… 😛 Serials like Fauji, Circus and Sea Hawks also adorned the era! There are others which I might not remember, some which I might have skipped. But one thing’s for sure they were all worth remembering, worth writing about.

On this note, with a heavy heart I bid adieu to this series!

For the final time it’s Tanananana tananaanaa……….. 🙁

The good old Malgudi Days- 2

So here I am again, waiting to get back into those “glorious days” of Dordarshan. 🙂 Thanks to the fantastic readers, we have had a lot of well-deserving suggestions for the part-2. (If you haven’t read Part-1, read it here)  While I am happy that my Ghajjinisia isn’t contagious, the scores of options had me thinking about part-3 of this series as well! (only if my audience never minds 🙂 )

Let’s get started with Bricks n bats… Who can ever forget (except for me of course) the never-ending thrashing, crashing, tongue twisting, body mincing and teeth tittering episodes of Tom n Jerry (a thunderclap here). Kicking off the dust with a roaring lion, was the story of treacheries, deception and mockery of two interwoven souls, a shrewd mouse and an angry cat :P… A laugh riot gripped us; this is one cartoon that everybody loved, AGE NO BAR! Mom, dad, friends, granddad, the toddler, just everybody! Although it’s still alive and kicking on cartoon network, watching it on Doordarshan was something perceptively different.

Tom n Jerry

Phir Wahi Talash telecasted at Sunday noons, was another interesting love story that gripped memories during the 90’s era. There were two different stories on the screenplay, and both were equally intriguing. And as mentioned by a fellow blogger “It was directed by Mr. Lekh Tandon, Raveena Tandon’s father and starring Shahid Kapoor’s Mom, Ms. Neelima Azeem…” Another thing that I remember from the serial is the title song, a ghazal by Mr. Chandan Das!

Naa jee bhar ke dekha, na kuch baat ki,

Badi arzoo thi mulaqat ki…

Next on the list is an all time favorite “Shrimaan Shrimati”, the story of two neighbors vying to get the attention of each other’s wife! “Ghar ki biwi daal ke jaisi, Aur ki biwi lagti hai murgi” 😛 LOL. The characters Keshav, Prema Shalini, DIlbura uncle, chintu, Koki-ji and Mr. Gokhale, (Gokhale yaar kuch idea soch) all were a class apart :D. The hanging garden hand of DIlbura oops Dilruba, and the smirks of Keshav, and not to forget the “Takla” boss 😀   Jhakass!

Shrimaan_Shrimati

Holidays were bliss, especially when they were a 10 day elongated “Dussehra vacations”. A month or two before Diwali, we had broadcastings of Ramanand Sagar’s “Ramayana”, and in my opinion there can’t be any better sequel! Every evening 7-10, those three hours, eyes glued to the T.V sets and I was lost thinking, wish I was like “Shri Rama”! My favorite part was when we had two heavily laden and celestial powered arrows crashing against each other in the magnitude of bright colorful lights :).

The Ramayana

The message that it conveyed, the adventures that it showcased, and not to forget the casting, everything was simply superb! I also remember playing along wooden swords, Bows n arrows, and the mighty “Gada” with my elder brother! 🙂 Dussera to me also meant, eating heart-full of Jalebis 😀  What golden days….sigh!!

Hmm… I know I would be stretching too far after this (you can yawn once I’m done! :P) I have a lot to write, and lot to express, but everything can’t be mentioned in the limited space that I have! So are we expecting a part-3? That’s my question to you!

If you think we’re up for another part, do let me know! And yes, don’t forget to mention your share of good days, and your favorite series 🙂 Keep reading this space for more…

Till the next time, it’s ADIOS

Tanananananana…tananananaananaa

The good old Malgudi Days – 1

There are some stories that you just can’t just forget, no matter how many decades go by…. Swami and his friends, The Mithaiwala, A Horse and Two Goats are some episodes from “Malgudi Days”, embedded like scriptures in my mind. I remember as a kid, how I used to wait for this very program with my friends and then we used to humm the magical tone “Tananananananaaa….tanannaaanannnaaa”  in sync with the mystical flute. 🙂 🙂

What characters were those, so simple yet so everlasting! Stories of common people from a common village with extraordinary direction and acting, Mr. Shankar Nag did a very fine job there!

90’s was an era that was golden and twinkling, we just had Doordarshan and yet we have endless memories of the few options that were available.” Byomkesh Bakshi”, the detective thriller that had your mind’s eye running the James Bond way. “Mitti ke rang” showcased the reverberatingly different aspects of life, every single episode illustrated a new situation, a new story!

Sunday mornings weren’t a half-sleepy, half frenzied fiasco… Duck tales with Uncle Scrudge McDuck and his nephews Huey, Duey and Luey marked start of the day, swimming in a heap of gold coins to count wealth, new treasure hunts and what not!

This was followed by Talespin, with Ballu and his stereoscopic “Chakkar-ghinni udaan” and Madame Mahalingam. Then came the Jungle Book, and we were all lost in the expeditions of Mowgli “the chaddi boy”-as we called him, bhalu, bageera, sher khan, akdu-bakdu, leela, tabaki….. <3

Weekends had special paranthas on the menu, and not to forget sweets and cookies. Yummy! 😛 Overflowing tummies and an extravagant dream frenzy then led us to the favorite Indian time pass during the 90’s: CRICKET. If I say it in my buddy Avijit’s wordings “Bwoy we loved it!” 😀 This is one game that every Indian must have played through his childhood, and we would play this ad infinitum until the sun declared a ceasefire. 😛

Back home there were scores of fiction stories still waiting with Vikram-Betaal, The Little Mermaid, I Dream of Jeannie, Karamchand and Chota Jadugar… New movie songs ruled the dinner time with Chitrahaar and all the best. I still remember laying a bet on what would be the no.1 song for the week 🙂 Personal favorite being the invisible dancer song “Muqabla-Muqabla”, which inadvertently led the charts for over 6 months…  : )

As a result I was always out-standing on Mondays, as homework never bothered me! 😀

Oh yes I forgot to mention “Taaro”, that came Saturday mornings, with a tagline song dragon ka beta taaro 🙂 simply loved it!

Crap, I forgot another one “Nukkad”, one of the most adored shows of all time! (Seems I am suffering from Ghajjinisia : ) )

Today we do have a large pile up of channels, but no story worth the talk, no characters that make us think “wish life was like that”, accompanied by scarcity of dreamland!

We do have the TRP doodling, so-called “Reality Shows” where there is nothing bona fide! Khoadies, Raakhi ka khatam-var, Rahul ki Vidaai, Spits-ville, Big Loss…Man!! All big bhoolshit…

The other Soap operas we have are the likes of Saas bhi kabhi Bahu thi, utran, bartan and more such crap where almost every “Gharelu” lady has 3 husbands… one dies, another comes and then sometimes an additional lover…or it’s the other way round the “Perfect Pati” has 2 or more wives along with a complimentary girlfriend sometimes kids. Gimme a break!!!  A spiced up vamp with overt makeup and some unreal acting (unreal as in fake), accompanied by some futile camera moments and off-course some horror-ifying music make it a perfect “Hogwash Package”

That’s it for now, had enough beep-beep… We’ll take more digs in the next post  : )

Just to make sure that nothing goes beyond limits, this has a part-2 : ) So, if you think you loved the euphoric 90’s and that my Ghajjinisia has missed some memorable stuff… Do let me know, it’s surely going to be there in the next part!

Till then “Tananananananaaa….tanannaaanannnaaa” 🙂

A Hope

A flickering hope in despondency,

like a rebellious flare in the womb of a storm,

and the afflicting Déjà vu of failure,

pulling thy across the lines of anticipate…

The lightning strikes a chord,

with the strings of despair and anguish

while thou navigate the conscience

To the beats of an effervescent life…

The thoughts break  autumn’s monotony,

to the resplendent light of springs

and the blossoms meet  cacophony…

Just like a dewdrop kissing the earth,

the touch of whose makes the hoarse periphery,

a delight to walk on…

Hope

Just like the sun oozing out of his siesta

from the deep blue sea…

The insight outshines thy desire,

and thou command an enigma of sanguinity…

The naked half-moon exposing

its shining bare skin,

across the bed sheet of clouds

and the stammering gloom of night…

The darkness makes the shine more affluent,

like happiness leaping amidst a masquerade of gloom…

A hope is more than

a few fluttered words

it is the fortitude of forbidden times,

and the reformation of finesse…

a hope is more than just “A Hope“

Hum Spam Kar Chuke Sanam!

A pinch of curiosity might have trickled your drainage via the title… Well actually, I have been thinking of penning down this titillating post since quite a while now, but time constraints you know!

P.S: the above line is mentioned just to highlight the Beeziness of the protagonist here (or antagonist maybe)

On a solemn note, I would like to bring to your kind notice that I have been spammed with an overwhelmed amount of emails, messages and calls. (You guessed it right, I just wrote a leave application to my boss before writing this)

SPAMMED!

From iPhone in 3 Rs, to some girl wanting to meet me, and a guy in the UK lottery department notifying me that I have just been declared a billionaire (Given the fact that I don’t even know how many zeroes are there in this figure, this is ridiculous!), I have been ruthlessly spammed. The interesting part is that I even got some messages confirming the aforesaid financial improvidence of mine. Something like this!!

“This is to inform you that you have won a prize money of Ninety five Thousand Pounds (GBP95, 000.00) for the 2011 Online International E-mail Draw which was Organized by Coca-Cola Company of UK. All participants were selected through a Computer Balloting System drawn from Two Hundred Thousand E-mail Addresses”

and i thought I’ve been unlucky! 😮

While the so called “Spam” did fooled my buoyancy couple of years back, (being a billionaire, and some beautiful, fair, 5’7 girl wanting to talk to me “Mujhse dosti karoge” types) the repeated bludgeoning of my wombed patience has given birth to the SPAMasura – the anti-spam man! (no flashy underwear, webbed costume or a sword for that matter) Asura coz this is Kalyuga…Yo!! 😛

SPAMasura can be anyone who’s a NO-ONE and wants to be a SOME-ONE! He is the answer to the frustration and quandary of the crowd bombarded with blatant looking marriage proposals, million dollar inventions, and Flat kharido – chamach jeeto offers every day!

Talking about marriage proposals, a friend of mine barely escaped a shock-hemorrhage when SHE read this email.

Hi there SWEETY, this is Nina, a Model from Mumbai, i saw your profile online and would be interested for a courtship.  I’m 27 years, 5′ 7”, A FUN-LOVING, attention-seeking & a pampered GIRL I believe, for a fruitful life together, you have to be connected by heart… I am sure once we meet, we’ll be GOOD TO MARRY!!

ooolala!

Another interesting story, as told by my friend: He got an email from some African girl narrating the incident of how her father’s death led the relatives to conspire her killing for the X billion dollars that she inherited. And then she wanted him to help her settle in India, and arrange for the stay here in lieu of 50% of the Inherited will! Holla if you hear me!

Happily ever after

She mailed her a photograph (obviously pretty-2), and they communicated almost daily via emails… Everything seemed to be in “happily ever after” lineage until my friend finally found her to be a big burly Nigerian operating in Delhi! 😮 😀

The Nigerian must have definitely seen a Bollywood movie otherwise who uses such pathetically monotonous ideas! you bad MAMBA JAMBA! 😛

A thought of marrying the massive Nigerian just tousled shivers down his spine… (Don’t run yer imaginations people)

Burp before you BEEP! 😀 😛  

There are so many other SPAMS, which I cannot mention here just for the sake of my innocent readers… :p (try running yer imaginations here) 😉

I am sure someone, somewhere might have been getting SPAMMED! (Shahrukh style) 🙂

Do share your experience, we might see a part -2,  kyunki “Hum Spam Kar Chuke Sanam 😉

A Wandering Thought

Alone in the night,

descending the stairs,

I desolate happiness,

out of scars

The scars of past,

and present and future,

And the happiness of a wandering thought

A Wandering Thought...

In the broad daylight,

when I fade out

My shallow heart

confines desires…

A blurred vision,

and numb nerves

A wandering loafer soul

And a wandering thought…

I leap mountains,

and walk through the seas

Across the wind,

trimming the fire

I let myself breathe,

and calm down

I surrender my ego

To a wandering thought…

The Bomb – bay

13th again, had an unusual day followed by a scary night. History repeats itself, but in our country it reiterates incessantly. Hopeless leaders and useless protocols! Or not “Hopeless” or “Useless” maybe, even these words are useful enough.

The Bomb-bay

The narration goes like this – someone comes to our country, guns down people, executes bomb blasts, gets caught, and we play court-court with him! With hordes of money laundered around his SAFETY, we make him our national son-in-law. Philanthropic as we are, that’s what we do when someone stabs us back! We step aside after crunching them in a war, release prisoners, talk about PEACE (Pakistan’s Easily Available Convivial Empathy) only to witnesses shattered PIECES of hopes, kinship, and innocent lives.

Dushman ko bhi seene se lagana nahin bhoole ,
hum apne buzurgon ka zamaana nahi bhoole ,
Tum aankh ki barsaat bachaye huye rakhna ,
kuch log abhi aag lagana nahin bhoole ………..

I am not being Nostalgic, for I never get a chance to be! Every time the memory starts fading, a fresh wound is stabbed and then as my friend Chandan mentioned “And another bunch of nerds are out to say “Insaniyat Zindabad…Mumbai will prevail”…they happen to be India’s representatives”

I know Mumbai will always prevail, but what about Bomb-bay?? And what about Kashmir, and Delhi, and Indore and…. What about India, and the Indians! We have been habitual of this nuisance…I know mere talking won’t do and I realize it would require a mass movement, maybe like the one in Libya! When and how? I am ashamed I don’t know!
Maybe it’s not about Pakistan or Afghanistan, it’s about Terrorism! Maybe, it’s about how we’re strong yet so weedy! There are so many questions, and the answer is a “MAYBE”
On this transcribe I recollect Faraz’s verses…

Chiraagh Jalana Toh Puraani Rasmein Hain ‘Faraz’…
Ab Toh Tere Shehar Ke Log Insaan Jala Detey Hain……!

The Oak Tree

He stood alone on the hill,

through dusk to dawn

His roots dug deep,

deeper into thoughts

Thoughts of sunlight,

and the rays of hope

For his progenitors,

for the leaves, the branches

Thoughts of monsoon,

when summers pinched

And of winters,

When rains soaked his tears

He was always thinking,

for he was The Oak Tree

He was proud of the leaves,

that spawned his shadow

He endowed branches,

that unified his euphoria

The roots were his strength,

his indelible self

The only hope,

that touched his revere

He always loved them,

for he was The Oak Tree

He braved ages,

and the swindling time

He fought the storm,

the drought and the quivers

To strangers he bore resilience,

a resilience against the blistering swelter

He was always like this,

for he was The Oak Tree 

His leaves changed color,

much like the weather

The branches tore his skin,

he wanted them to brave his age

Deserted he stood,

with his shadow

For his good days,

for leaves and birds and greenery

He always waited,

for he was The Oak Tree

There was a friend, a brother

a father, and a lover

for there was “The Oak Tree…”

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